Tag Archives: change

Changing Greys

Define Black, White and Grey

Did you ever have a strong opinion on something, state it for others to know about you and then come upon a piece of information in a video or an impassioned plea that changed your take?
I both love and don’t love when that happens.

First my reaction is – aw crap. Now what I said is making me the fool.
My second reaction is – well, it’s the same as I’ve always thought. My opinion can be a little of both in many cases.

It’s hard to have strong opinions because they generally mean you do not waiver. It’s a black and white opinion. Problem is, there are very few things that are that clear cut. Change mostly happens in the grey area. Most of the world and the opinions in it are forms of grey. Or is that gray – see?

This leads to inner peace that comes from an ability to both be flexible and still stand strong on opinions. It’s wise to set a few areas of higher importance. These are guiding our decisions. They are our principles. If you find those, they are hard to execute sometimes but you know that’s who you are.

You will not cheat on your spouse, or you will not harm people.
You will not… fill it in. Also, know your no matter what’s – the things you will do. These are based upon higher principles. They make the decisions that comes out of those principles easy to make.
The rest of the thousands of calls you have to make can be some of both sides.

I see it like this:
The highest/best and lowest/worst ends of the opinion and decision spectrum are black and white. They’re all the way out on the edge.
Their gravity keeps all the greys, or grays, contained in the middle.
Not having to be concerned about being right all the time brings peace through contentment.


The Generosity of Observance

Observance of Trendlines

When you observe what’s happening, there are clues to notice.
Those clues can lead to some perception bringing insight.
If you draw the line in the direction you see happening,
the perception most often leads to a logical conclusion not far off of that line.
It’s good to have an open mind and not to be judgmental before you know facts. It’s also good to make yourself aware of what you see playing out.

Prepare yourself with insight
you may not want to acknowledge

Let’s look at your career or another aspect of your life.
Would you draw a graph line over time in the up or down direction about it? How steep is that line? Is it more straight as a trend line or jagged, moving up and then down? Is it flatlining?
The point is to observe a trend as it has played out over time.
Remembering what you thought was going to happen and then getting a result brings you the experience of noticing your thoughts as they actually played out. You begin to qualify what grabs your attention and learn to trust your instincts.
People are not as good at hiding their thoughts as they think. They can’t hide feelings, especially if they haven’t done any introspection and are thus unaware of them.
There are always tells to notice.

Being observant is a generous act

Being observant is generous because it involves a connection to others for people to benefit from. That generosity is available to those who pick up on and acknowledge the information itself. Generous just as the person holding the flashlight in a dark room is, exposing perceptions of a world around them to light.
Observance attempts communication with people who don’t realize they are communicating with you.
It tells you what words cannot. It reveals a perception which is probably truth.
We are always communicating – sending signal.
We are not always listening. Listening is generous.
Listening and observing are receiving signal. That’s the part of communication most are missing. Modern culture is so taken with sending.
It can certainly help you on your path, giving you more information with which to decide. If handled with kindness, it is a chance at a deeper level of connection.
Verbal communication that can come from observation is a deeper level of life sharing.
Open your eyes, ears, mind and heart.
There’s signal out there waiting to be processed.
Your kindness will be noticed.

Mind Your Own Business

Be Your Own Boss

I can still hear my Dad saying it.
It’s a mentality that I like.
It’s one that says “I’m done trying to impress you.”
Rather than impress, why not relate?


To be my best, I want contentment with my own work.
If I’m proud of my work, I can find others with whom it will resonate.
If that’s not you, that’s ok.


A great way to be your own boss and find contentment, even if you are doing work for another company, is to be yourself. No airs, no fake fronts. Just be you. The reason is that connection to others is easier when you do. It’s also real.


It’s connection in some way that leads to commerce.
Dig in and work for/on yourself.
Nobody else has your dream but many share pieces of it.
Find them and you find your community.
It’s easier now than ever to find people of like needs and shared interest. Current technology aside, it’s always been that way whether you care to admit it or not.


You always come home to you.
You are doing the work of your craft for your own – your family’s – benefit. You are working for yourself.
It really shouldn’t be showing up for a job, rather, a paycheck, that you didn’t think about doing before you spent years going to work at it. Think about what you want to do and head in that direction.


Where you work isn’t the point.
You are still in business for yourself.
And your business is yourself.


Choose well, or keep choosing.


When Communication Is Not

There is flexibility within communication.
Flexibility attempts to reach an understanding of the point.
As long as we are seeking connection.


Flexibility’s opposite is assumption.
That says see it my way.
Assumption is not communication.
It’s closer to direction.
Direction is only half of communication.
Direction without understanding is ineffective.
A lack of understanding is then not really communication at all.


So how do we get one to understand us?


Good communication is two-way input and output
that leads to understanding.
It’s really that simple.

Honor your Struggle

The struggle is essential to doing anything worthwhile


There are obstacles to overcome, always.
They may have little or nothing to do with your chosen enterprise.
In order to move forward with your goals, you must solve them or stagnate.


Rather than bemoaning the problems that arise, you must force yourself to realize that this is actually the path to your goal. It’s you actively realizing your dream.


What you gain from solving issues fills you up in ways you never imagined as being central to your pursuit. You are empowered bit by bit through the difficulties. It not only pushes you forward in your working progress, but it prepares you with fortitude and determination.


When things are easy there is little invested. When things fail, along with the pain, it allows the growth and experience needed as part of the process to be less harsh, leading a charge of small successes propelling you through what comes next.


Quitting, by contrast, tells the story to the last page, right away.


It should be hard because changing a person is not what we thought our goal really was.
Rest assured that it is.
We are being prepared, taught. You need the struggle to succeed.
Find a comfort in knowing your struggle.
It means your dream is really happening.
Push on.


Are You Invested?


Consider carefully your investments

Not money but time.
What do you invest your time doing?
What is your practice in what you build towards?


Investing your time leads to everything.
It builds. It compounds. It is a root practice.
Those not engaging in it choose to their detriment.
Settling, complacency and selfishness are the opposites.


Investing means putting in time that is difficult up front, such that there is less or no repercussive action from the handling of a tough decision.
Investing means putting your energy into the right vehicle that produces fruit into the future.
Investing means sacrificing something now so that it can grow later. That which grows from proper investment, compounds.
Investing is an ability to see beyond yourself towards something that has a chance to fail.
Investments always build a piece of what eventually produces good results.


You are an investor.
Not all investments work.
But those that do are life changing for generations.
That’s worth your time.


The Sharing of Experience


Sharing is the point where
experience brings value

Knowledge is the learning of information.
What we do with that knowledge is the value of information in our lives.
It may not be as simple as passing the information on to someone, like tutoring or mentoring through a skill. The constant pursuit of knowledge settles us. First because we’re not bored, idle, which leads to problems. More-so because we realize a deeper level of thoughts and see our place in the bigger picture.


Rather than over-valuing ourselves, we seek to settle in to one of the millions of ways we affect others by interacting. We may have an ability to be in conversations on many various topics of discussions with some knowledge on each.
We also may offer many other things by the experience of our settled pursuit of knowledge. Have you ever heard when someone recalls what you once said to them and you are struck by it? You feel the effect of your affect.
The result of gaining experience through knowledge brings the intangible value of connection.


Until the day we die we are growing in many ways.
Most of our body regenerates on a cellular level, we form new pathways in our brains by learning and experiencing.
We are setup to grow.


Growth promotes the learning of information.
Information brings knowledge.
Knowledge promotes action.
Action with knowledge brings experience.
Experience promotes a settled spirit – peace.
Peace brings value.
Value attracts Connection.
Connection brings you to new information where you begin again.
There is the circle.


Information, knowledge, action, experience, peace, value, connection.
The attraction of value draws those seeking any part of it’s process.


Your Career’s Relation To Money

Helping People Make Money/
Make Money Helping People

Helping, People and Money.
Careers are built with these in play.
Which takes priority is the foundational philosophy beneath a realized purpose in your life.

If you are not the owner, you are helping other people make money and that’s what you get paid to do. You create, manage, market, sell, or administrate for a product or service that is sold. You often don’t have a say in the vision or direction of the product or service. That’s most jobs. There is both comfort and frustration in that role. But, as they say, it’s a living.

Knowing your role is crucial to your happiness and sense of fulfillment in it. Most fit in here and that’s not posed as a problem. However, you need to find yourself filled up in your role.

If you become your own boss, the role instantly changes. You take the risk many are unable to make by putting your decisions to the test in the marketplace. The rewards of good relationships and wise decisions afford you the best chance at achieving your purpose. We all face our purpose at one point. What am I good at, what do I wish I had done more of, what do I love to do, and how can I make a living at that?

You have the opportunity to help other people by what you do for them. If you do that well you will make money. Do that really well, and you get the chance to help more people. Help more people, make more money. A little x a lot = enough.

The concept of helping others is really a simple one. It’s you doing your best to provide a value in product or service that makes it easier or better in some way for those that use it. Not so benevolent, just powering through the practice of your purpose and what you love to do. If you can do that for yourself, you are welcomed into our current era where it’s ever easier to provide that help to people enough to earn a living. A change in concept is the first step to making better decisions that lead to many leaps of investment in yourself – for others.

Money is not bad. Money is necessary. Money has large swings in the echelons of lifestyle equating to having “enough.” Purpose is far more necessary – as proven in being happy making a living with what you love doing and being okay if you’re not “rich” from it. Being rich isn’t a number anyway. It’s having more than enough. You’ve made your life rich on purpose.

Be afraid enough to change your world.
Be afraid enough not to!
What you do with fear of unfulfilled purpose propels you if you let it.

Why Failing Is Good For You

Failure sharpens you in many ways

To gain experience you will fail. Failing is part of the process. Failing readies you.
Failing is the time before dreams happen, a time for you to work on your character. Character is a necessary ingredient to being where you want to be – succeeding in your life and your endeavor. Failure is the time when some big self-evaluating tests come. How you handle them shapes your character, each one, choice by choice. Repeated over time, it sets into your personality and shapes your decisions. While it is possible to have monetary success without character being formed, it will eventually show you to be incomplete, and thus not successful at life.


What failure means and how deep it goes you might not know. You may have a lot to say about not making catastrophic errors. You may not. It’s all the process.
What you find out along the way not only sharpens character but sharpens your workflow. Your craft gets better. Your direction may change but your processes improve.


Failing means action. You have to take your idea and plan it, work it, do it. Give your plan a chance to improve by failure, by some activity. Success is the end game of any step, allowing you to move on to the next one. So mini failures in the steps of each part of a plan can be read as constant improvement in small doses, or refinement.


Success to many can imply relaxing a little more – kicking your feet up – letting the system you’ve built work for you. Failure means you have a lot more to do. Just like the idea of retirement. If you love what you do you may never retire. I’ll take action and failure to shape my life for the rest of my life.


Failing is succeeding. It’s the verb of successes formula because it is the action, succeeding is the result. Make your plan and go fail until it works.


Fear in Wait

Comfort kills us.
We are paid just enough to be comfortable.
Of course, our version of a comfortable lifestyle is relative to our pay.
Comfort lacks desire and drive and ambition.
Ambition has dealt with fear and keeps it in it’s proper place where it can be used by you. Fear is a user. In correct doses, it’s a motivator.
The comfort hidden in waiting keeps a dream from happening.
What is your dream?
Acknowledge your fear the same way you would your dream and put both in the position of working for you.
How long will you wait – until you’re let go?
When you have to, is when you do.