Tag Archives: principles

Changing Greys

Define Black, White and Grey

Did you ever have a strong opinion on something, state it for others to know about you and then come upon a piece of information in a video or an impassioned plea that changed your take?
I both love and don’t love when that happens.

First my reaction is – aw crap. Now what I said is making me the fool.
My second reaction is – well, it’s the same as I’ve always thought. My opinion can be a little of both in many cases.

It’s hard to have strong opinions because they generally mean you do not waiver. It’s a black and white opinion. Problem is, there are very few things that are that clear cut. Change mostly happens in the grey area. Most of the world and the opinions in it are forms of grey. Or is that gray – see?

This leads to inner peace that comes from an ability to both be flexible and still stand strong on opinions. It’s wise to set a few areas of higher importance. These are guiding our decisions. They are our principles. If you find those, they are hard to execute sometimes but you know that’s who you are.

You will not cheat on your spouse, or you will not harm people.
You will not… fill it in. Also, know your no matter what’s – the things you will do. These are based upon higher principles. They make the decisions that comes out of those principles easy to make.
The rest of the thousands of calls you have to make can be some of both sides.

I see it like this:
The highest/best and lowest/worst ends of the opinion and decision spectrum are black and white. They’re all the way out on the edge.
Their gravity keeps all the greys, or grays, contained in the middle.
Not having to be concerned about being right all the time brings peace through contentment.


Does Your Idea Have Heart?

The best idea is nothing without heart

Energy comes from heart. Not from the idea.
A great idea planted where it can’t grow, will not.


Heart brings belief. Belief with heart convinces. Being convinced brings consideration. Consideration from being convinced leads to plans. Good plans include principles. Principles solidify and reinforce a good plan. Action resulting from the already begun momentum leads to more principled action that productively feeds itself.
Then back to heart.


Do you still believe in your idea?
If so, then it’s about to gain some forward motion.
Will it last? Check the life organ that pumps the energy.
Where it goes depends on the heart to action continuum.

Growing Down To Learn Again

Remember when you were
first learning to talk?

Me neither.

We didn’t mind that we were wrong much of the time.
It was ok because we knew we were learning.

We were figuring out how to put words and sounds together to express ourselves
and let another person know what was up with us.


I don’t think we got that much better over the years.
Just because we use words these days as grown-ups doesn’t mean we’re really sharing information well with others.


When you grow up, you learn principles of adult life.
I’ve seen many eschew this challenge. (see what I did there?)

When you grow down, you admit that you have more to learn and you position yourself into the spirit of learning as you did when you were a kid.


If you’ve ever seen a true craftsman or expert, they are confident enough in their understanding that they don’t need to impress upon you their level of knowledge.
They are comfortable with learning a new piece of information about their craft because of their secureness with it.


They have grown up to adopt that spirit. They have evolved back into the open mindedness of a kid, who happens to have attained a great deal of knowledge.


3 reasons to grow down


1. We were more honest as kids
Now we have all these things we hide, things we protect from other people when we talk with them. So we can’t really be honest too much or they’ll know something we don’t want known. We learn that there are times we don’t want people around us peering in to our lives and that being honest makes us too vulnerable.


2. We use our words incorrectly
We might know some smart words but we don’t have any real idea
what they mean. Still we use them to sound all big so people will think we’re smart. Using big words that people don’t know is only smart if you’re using it right, and/or in the right setting. Otherwise you’re not being smart AND not communicating. Why talk at all then?
Nobody’s really listening.


3. We think we’re done learning now
Why? Because we’re grown up?
The more you know, the more you know there is to know.
But we get content. Then our content gets content. Then we flatline.


I wonder if the reason we were so able to be happy as kids is that we were fine with the spirit of learning. That’s the mode we accepted. We gained a greater sense of self as we learned more, but there comes a point when most think they know all they need to know, and stop learning at that kid rate.


Our sense of wonder stopped growing. Our sense that more was possible, that we could accomplish what we envision fades away slowly.
That we could envision something that might not be common or understood gets scary and so we conform.
School teaches us that too – conformity.


What does growing up mean?
Why are we in such a hurry to grow up when growing up means moving to standards not dreamed by you?


Grow down.


Admit that you’re still learning. In continuing to learn you can let go of the social pretenses and allow yourself the freedom of wonder in a statement like “I don’t know, let’s find out”, or one of my favorites, “what if…”


You’ll remember how to dream again.
That charges you up.


In professing to know you’re refusing to grow.
And any dreams just won’t be as fun to push into.


Roots grow down.