Tag Archives: real

The Truth Is Not PC

The action is dumb – not the person


Let’s figure out how to call dumb things dumb and separate it from the person.  I do stupid things too, and by the way so do you. Let’s call it what it is so we can do that less by being aware of it.
I find that tact has a large role to play here.


If you’re going to call out something that people will be sensitive to, the part to figure out isn’t whether you should call it out or not, we can make that decision easily. Rather, it’s how to say it.  If done too harshly,  you’ll be pushing people away and the point will be lost.


Smart people do dumb things and dumb people do smart things


I’m not a fan of the political correctness action anymore.
It’s not honest.
“PC” used to just be called polite. It was needed. Unfairness was and is present but calling an action what it is remains the truth – on both sides. Inequality isn’t right and neither is manipulation.


I hope we’re evolving to this. I’m hoping the development in acceptance of the internet made a cultural difference. Online we can be more anonymous by sight. We can be held to what we offer. It shook up the way we connect. It seems that bigotry in the younger generations isn’t what it used to be with many views available online being the norm. A person’s world isn’t so sheltered. Isolation breeds unaccepting behavior. Even a little progress is still progress.


Some don’t like when a truth is called out and we hope they come back around. Speaking truth is not being mean. We can hold back a bit out of kindness. Having a definite take can serve to open discussion if truth is the goal instead of being right even if you’re not.


The truth is part of another’s point of view too. Not having all the viewpoints may mean you are still gathering the facts. Truth can be viewed from two different perspectives. Even with that, there are obvious points to agree upon.


The danger is when lies become the truth. When someone lies, the actions of themselves and the others involved move forward in the wrong direction from that lie. It gains momentum. It always gets found out, but the wake of damage ruins lives – potentially generationally.


 Obstinance in lies cuts the connection. In the end, we’re all trying to find connection.

Tell me the truth. If I’m being dumb, I’d rather deal with it now.

We have to make it our world to sort through what’s true and find the real parts where our views intersect.
Know who’s delivering real to us. Value that.

That’s progress.
We can work with progress.


How Thank You Works

How can you make “thank you” feel bad?

The Method

Power-play someone.
Saying thank you to show that you are in control is exposed in how you say it.
Try saying “I LOVE YOU” in a hard tone to your dog and see if she feels the love.
She will back away.


If it’s a platitude, don’t bother with the nicety – it’s performing the opposite effect.
Either you were never taught how to express a true emotion properly or you’re gaming us.


Thanks is a great thing when felt and expressed.
Make it work – use it right.
Honesty is funny that way.
Please don’t abuse it so as to take away from it’s proper intent by those who mean well.
I’d rather not even have to question it’s authenticity.


Feelings are Everyone’s Tell

You have to feel thankful to express it properly.
Words by themselves, not connected to the corresponding actions hold no real power.
Manipulation might bring you the short term result, but it will not engender continued buy-in.
Honesty connects to the power of expression. It’s why a good speaker, telling a compelling story brings us along and connects us to their assertion.


A real declaration of your appreciation should bring about a release in you and an openness in the recipient. That is ingested, processed in an instant through your head, heart and emotion filters and a form of reciprocation is the result, whether acted upon or not.


Manners are not just learned they are the result of being comfortable with yourself and putting that out as a standard in going about your day. Your output most often matches your input. Your choice is in how you receive, and what you do with, that input. What comes out is what you’ve decided.


Thanks is more than just the word, it’s a methodology.
Intentionality works both ways. It shows us what you’re really aiming at.
I prefer honesty in expression.
And to those who continue trying to do that –
I say Thank You!


Are You Full Of It?


You think you’re
getting away with it.
We’re onto you.

If you’re telling me all this info and I come to find out that you’re full of it, that is a huge waste of my time. Of course, it goes well beyond that.

I spent time getting to know you, and then this? It’s hard enough to find out what’s real.
I have to know what’s real to be able to make my best decisions for my job, my responsibilities, my goals. I cannot solve a single thing in my head if what I’m basing it on is not true. Any decision I would make from your information would at best be inefficient and at worst negatively affect my reputation.
A good reputation is of high value.

 Once I find that out about you, I cannot give you much of my time.

Be real and we can solve most anything.
If that’s not you, then I question what I actually know about you at all.

Goodbye, I have to move on for now until, hopefully, this gets solved.

 That sounds harsh to read.

But enough mention isn’t given to being manipulated or lied to.

We all make mistakes and do this on occasion, even the most honorable.

We’re human and we all fail. Without some leniency, we’d all just be circling vultures.

 But, when it’s a uncovered to be a pattern of consistent behavior, that’s a turning point.

It has then been a character discovery that goes beyond lapses.
It is especially noticeable when there’s larger weight to the manipulation and deception.

 It leads to all the wrong things and I’m not going to play.

“Nice” has to have it’s boundaries that allow honesty in any relationship to be the achievable goal.